


Catblocked

by pt_tucker



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Cockblocking, First Time, Humor, M/M, Power Imbalance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-01
Updated: 2017-08-01
Packaged: 2018-12-09 15:38:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11672052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pt_tucker/pseuds/pt_tucker
Summary: Sephiroth does like Cloud. Really, he does. He just likes his cat more.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Up_sideand_down](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Up_sideand_down/gifts).



> Written for the FF7 Fanworks Exchange! I hope that Up_sideand_down (and anyone else reading this) enjoys it!
> 
>  **FYI** I'm writing this with the assumption that Cloud is at least eighteen, possibly even nineteen by this point in time. Also, there is a power imbalance between Sephiroth and Cloud, which is sometimes played off for laughs. Obviously the same situation would be seen very differently in real life.

Cloud’s lips parted to form a silent “O” as Sephiroth pressed an open-mouthed kiss against the crook of his neck. Breath leaked out of his lungs and into air in an audible hiss as steady fingers slid down his back and cupped his ass. Gaia. This was not how he’d expected his graduation to go.

Not that he was complaining.

Cloud closed his eyes. Sephiroth was-

His Adam’s apple bobbed as Sephiroth nibbled along the underside of his jaw.

Sephiroth was-

He jerked as Sephiroth’s knee came up between his legs and pressed against the hard outline of his erection.

Sephiroth was-

A soft noise not unlike that of an animal dying escaped into Sephiroth’s mouth as he devoured Cloud’s lips.

“Gaia.” The word came out in a whisper that wasn’t really meant for either of them.

“Problem?” Sephiroth pulled back enough that he could properly examine him. Green eyes slid across his flushed cheeks and undoubtedly disheveled hair, and Cloud wasn’t the least bit surprised when the corners crinkled with amusement. And then Sephiroth smirked at him.

_Smirked._

Cloud resisted the urge to ask who this strange clone was and what’d he’d done with the man who’d barely been able to acknowledge the newly graduated SOLDIERs at the party. The man who’d been unable to make simple conversation without coming off as some sort of awkward nerd who spent way more time watching war documentaries than interacting with people.

Cloud had had a _connection_ with that man. Finally, someone more socially illiterate than himself!

And then they’d slipped off to Sephiroth’s apartment and the darkly amused villain had come out.

“You appear to be lost in your thoughts.” Sephiroth grinned, all sharp and predatory before leaning in to whisper into Cloud’s ear. “Shall I take them away?”

Cloud nodded, unable to get the words out.

Sephiroth dropped down to his knees. 

Sephiroth. On his knees. In front of Cloud.

Cloud pressed his palms against his thighs, for lack of anything better to do with them. Somehow he got the feeling that Sephiroth wouldn’t mind if he curled his fingers through that long, silver hair, but Cloud just wasn’t ready for that level of commitment.

Sephiroth glanced at him. “Shall I-”

Whatever he’d been about to ask was lost when a loud crash sounded from the other room. Cloud jerked, stumbling back a few steps until he just about toppled over the sofa that they’d both silently decided to ignore in favor of making out in the middle of the living room. 

Sephiroth froze.

Another crash and Cloud’s focus shifted entirely to whatever lay behind the closed door. This wasn’t some sort of secret hazing, was it? Pretend to get head from the General and then see how the newly recruited SOLDIER Third handled a surprise…what? Not that many monsters that could both fit into a bedroom and be tamed enough that they wouldn’t immediately wreck everything in sight. Maybe a hellhound?

Sephiroth tilted his head ever-so-slightly, before shrugging and coming to his feet in a motion that was pure liquid grace. Cloud eyed the door even as Sephiroth pushed him down onto the sofa. Just because the ‘greatest SOLDIER there ever was’ didn’t seem to mind someone breaking into his apartment didn’t mean Cloud was fond of the idea of getting caught with his pants down. Literally.

Of course, things got a little hazy when Sephiroth climbed on top of him and began pulling his shirt out of his pants. Cloud shivered when fingertips glided across his abs.

Well, it was Sephiroth’s apartment. If he didn’t mind…

Another crash. 

Cloud rolled out from underneath Sephiroth and dashed towards the sword he’d let fall to the floor earlier in his haste to let Sephiroth have his wicked way with him. Or maybe have his wicked way with Sephiroth. One could never tell.

Sephiroth was _right there_ when he spun around, causing Cloud to take an unconscious step back. Gaia. He’d seen Sephiroth move before, but it was an entirely different feeling when he suddenly appeared before _you._

Sephiroth pushed Cloud’s blade down with a single gloved hand. Cloud tried not to feel insulted. 

“I think it’s time for you to leave.” 

And then Sephiroth was behind him, hands on his shoulders, gently but firmly showing him the door.

“But-” Cloud stopped himself. How did he even finish that statement? But I’m still really hard and I’d love to fuck you if you gave me the chance? The last thing he needed was to come off as some pushy asshole who didn’t take ‘go away’ for an answer.

“I would not be averse to doing this again some time,” Sephiroth said, as if reading his thoughts. Another crash from the other room. “At your apartment.”

“I don’t have an apartment.” Cloud was a _Third Class._ They didn’t get to leave the barracks until Second.

“I’ll assign you one.” Sephiroth continued pushing him. Cloud had no choice but to be marched towards the door.

“I don’t need your favor-”

“Goodbye.” Sephiroth opened the door with one hand and shoved Cloud out with the other. Cloud flipped around in time to see it slam in his face.

“If you assign me an apartment I won’t take it!” Cloud wasn’t going to start his very first official day as a SOLDIER as some kind of beloved pet of the General.

No answer.

“I mean it!”

Cloud didn’t know why he was yelling. It wasn’t like Sephiroth couldn’t hear him through the thin wood.

Sighing, he glanced down at his pants.

Gaia. How was he _still_ so hard? He darted to the elevator. Better get home and take care of that before the rest of the graduates started filtering back from the party.

He sent Sephiroth’s apartment one last glance before the elevator doors closed on him.

Weirdest night out _ever._

==========================================================

Sephiroth waited until he heard Cloud dash down the hallway before turning to give his bedroom door a frown. If he strained enough, he could hear the soft patter of tiny feet on his carpet, something which Cloud’s newly enhanced hearing might have been able to pick up if he’d not been…otherwise occupied. Sephiroth’s frown deepened.

He’d been careless.

Marching over to the door, he yanked it open with none of his usual grace. Luna scattered at the sudden onslaught of light, first under the bed, and then into the closet when Sephiroth lifted the bed. Slipping into the closet and shutting the door behind him, he snatched her up before she could completely destroy his clothing in an attempt to flee his annoyance. He held her up so that she was eye-level with him.

“I believe we had an agreement.”

Luna did not appear impressed with his attempts at intimidation. She stared past Sephiroth’s shoulder at something only she could see, choosing to ignore him rather than grant him an explanation for her rowdy behavior.

“I see.” Sephiroth set her back on the floor. She immediately took to licking the back of her paws, though they appeared as white as ever. Not a speck of dirt on her fur. 

Luna, as ever, was the only one of his subordinates who did not follow his orders. Even Genesis did not disobey when given a direct command.

Sephiroth ran a finger across the top of her head. “I should have you court marshaled.” 

Luna gave no acknowledgment of his threat. She never did.

She let out an annoyed meow when he picked her up, but quickly changed her tune when Sephiroth brought her into the kitchen and placed her on the counter. She stood up on her hind legs and watched as he pulled a can of cat food from its hiding place behind the plates. He scooped the food into a small dish - Luna insisted that she not eat out of a can like some common vermin - before tossing the trash into the makeshift garbage disposal he’d ‘requisitioned’ from Scarlet’s department. 

Cat evidence was likely not what the terrified assistant had assumed Sephiroth was going to use it for when he’d demanded to have it, along with the man’s promise to never tell anyone that he’d been the one to take it. For some reason people seemed to think that all of the top SOLDIERs went around murdering people and disposing of their bodies in ways that would make it so that they were never found.

Clearly Genesis gave them all a bad name.

Luna was content to allow him to stroke her back as she ate, though the occasional look she threw over her shoulder was clear in its message: he was only allowed such a luxury due to the food. Her green eyes, so similar to his own, stated quite plainly that he was to not get used to it.

A creature after his own heart. He knew all too well how it felt to have people constantly poking and prodding when all you wanted to do was relax. 

“There was no reason to create such a distraction,” he continued from earlier, not willing to allow the subject to drop, “Fair has assured me that Cloud Strife will be an exemplary SOLDIER.” Now that he’d actually passed the test to get in. 

And he didn’t stare at Sephiroth from the shadows like Sephiroth was some sort of prize to be won or notch to be bragged about.

Luna gave him a dubious look that Sephiroth didn’t grace with a response. He didn’t have to explain himself to her.

Cloud, on the other hand…

Well, hopefully he wouldn’t have to explain anything to him either.


	2. Chapter 2

Cloud was playing Super Smash SOLDIERs with his new roommate Rosso - and totally kicking her butt - when there was a knock at the door. They glanced at each other, and then they both shrugged.

Hopping off the sofa, Cloud went over to the door and threw it open, the hesitant smile on his face shifting into something a little more solid when he caught sight of Sephiroth. And a little more annoyed.

“Sir. Welcome to my new apartment.” He crossed his arms. 

Sephiroth did not look the least bit apologetic about having shuttled Cloud into one of the Second Class apartments. Ass. He could at least _pretend_. Even if Zack had told him that they’d been secretly looking for someone to bunk with Rosso after she’d had an…unfortunate incident. Just someone to hang out with her and make sure she didn’t…disappear. After dark. Someone like Cloud, whom she seemed to think was absolutely adorable.

Cloud wasn’t terrified for his life. Nope.

Sephiroth lounged against the doorway, his gaze entirely upon Cloud and not at all interested in the hellhole he’d so _graciously_ brought Cloud into.

“Cloud. Good to see you again.”

Cloud tried to remain annoyed, but couldn’t muster up the emotion when Sephiroth was silently devouring him with his eyes. “Good to see you again too, Sir.”

“Sephiroth. I prefer that all my SOLDIERs use my name during personal encounters.”

“Sephiroth,” Cloud repeated, nodding. 

He glanced back at Rosso, who was doing a poor job of acting like she wasn’t spying on them. On screen, her character was losing to Cloud’s, and considering he was halfway across the room with no controller in sight, that was pretty impressive.

Cloud turned back to Sephiroth. “Is there something you need?”

“I was wondering if I could have a moment of your time?” Sephiroth’s eyes darted towards Rosso before coming back to Cloud. “Alone.”

Cloud could feel the heat starting to creep up his neck. “Yeah, sure. C’mon in. Rosso had somewhere to be anyway.” Hopefully not behind a ChocoNugget dumpster with the remains of some poor trooper. 

“Oh? Do I?” Rosso purred when Cloud pulled her off the sofa.

“Yep!” Cloud walked her to the door in a manner that was no different than what Sephiroth had done to him the other night. Except this time it was more the pushee allowing the pusher to scoot them across the room rather than an unavoidable march. For only a Second, Rosso was frighteningly strong. 

Sephiroth stepped aside and allowed them to pass through the doorway.

“Well then, I shall endeavor not to get into too much trouble while I’m away.” Rosso winked at him.

“You could go see Cissnei,” Cloud offered, because he probably should make _some_ attempt to keep her from murdering innocents, or whatever else she did during her downtime. 

A dreamy sort of look passed over her face. “My dear Cissnei. So beautiful and red.”

She hummed as she sauntered down the hall.

Cissnei would forgive him. Probably.

Spinning around, he found Sephiroth examining his comic collection. His _dirty_ comic collection. Cloud ran over and snatched it out of his hand. Oh Gaia. Had he seen the page with the Malboro?

Sephiroth smirked. 

By the time Cloud had turned around from putting the book back in its proper place - that is, far, _far_ behind the other books about materia technique and other boring topics where no one but Sephiroth would ever think to look for it - Sephiroth had already removed his coat and was well on his way to chucking off his pants. Gaia. The man did not waste time, did he?

“You’ll have to forgive me for the other night,” Sephiroth said, sliding his belt through the loops on his pants. “Though it would seem I’m not the only one who lacks manners in this…relationship.” He glanced at the aborted game still sitting on pause on the TV screen.

A single conversation followed by an almost one-night stand wasn’t exactly what Cloud would call a ‘relationship,’ but, hey, if it got him laid by _General Sephiroth…_

“Well, somebody’s gotta get rid of the roommates, right?” Cloud said, though he didn’t bother hiding the question buried within the joke. He’d asked Kunsel if Sephiroth lived with anyone else and SOLDIERs’ go-to informant had just looked at him like he’d lost his damn mind. 

“Indeed,” Sephiroth answered.

Which wasn’t an answer at all, but Cloud wasn’t really that invested in getting to the bottom of the ‘Great Sephiroth Bedroom Mystery.’ Especially not when Sephiroth took hold of his wrists and pushed them together above his head with one hand while he began unbuckling Cloud’s belts with the other. 

Cloud strained against the hold, just to test it, but it was like trying to move a car. Except moving a car was actually possible given the right leverage.

Sephiroth hesitated for the briefest of moments, his eyes scanning Cloud’s face, before he apparently decided Cloud wasn’t about to start screaming bloody murder over a little restraint. He continued with his task.

He’d flung Cloud’s second belt across the room, somehow barely missing the TV despite not looking behind him even once, and was about to unzip Cloud’s pants when Sephiroth’s pocket began…meowing.

Cloud blinked. “That’s an interesting ringtone.”

Sephiroth huffed. He seemed content to ignore the awful noise and had just slipped his hand into Cloud’s underwear when the meowing turned into something closer to wailing. Cloud winced. Well this was awkward.

Sephiroth pulled back and took his PHS out of his pocket. He gave it a hard look and then slipped it back into his pants. Cloud sighed. He’d seen that frown before. 

The unfortunate life of a ShinRa lackey.

“Mission?”

“Of a sort. Forgive me. It appears I’m needed elsewhere. I’ll make this up to you, I promise.” Sephiroth hesitated a moment before leaning down and giving Cloud a kiss that was more sweet than sexual.

Cloud tried not to let the butterflies in his stomach stir up too much trouble.

He stepped aside and let Sephiroth slip out the door once the other man had reapplied his clothes, before deciding ‘why the hell not?’ and pulling Sephiroth down for one more kiss. 

Sephiroth was grinning when they parted. “I don’t think I’ve ever had someone yank me down by my cross.”

“Then maybe you should wear a shirt,” Cloud responded, probably more cheekily than was wise.

Sephiroth shook his head. “You are a bold man, Third Class Strife.” 

Cloud couldn’t help the silly smile that popped up on his face as he watched him take off down the hall. For a supposedly homicidal trainwreck, Sephiroth wasn’t so bad.

Or maybe that was Commander Rhapsodos he was thinking of.

=======================================

Sephiroth was fraught with nerves when he finally made it back to his apartment. He’d been forced to stop running when several people had begun to panic at the sight of _Sephiroth_ rushing through the halls, and he’d had to constrain himself to a brisk march instead. All the while his pocket had been sounding off in an incessant plea for help that had caused more than one onlooker to back away uncertainly. 

If the delay had caused something to happen to Luna…

Throwing open the door, he used his enhanced senses to locate her position and _then_ he allowed himself to run.

Darting into the kitchen, he found Luna calmly sitting on the counter, her paw on the walkie talkie Sephiroth had modified to contact his PHS. Upon seeing him, she stepped off the button and stood up on her hind legs and clawed at the cupboard that held her food.

Sephiroth was not impressed.

He picked up the walkie talkie. “This is an emergency communications device. Contrary to what you might believe, a late dinner is not an emergency.”

Luna whined. Clearly she did not agree.

Sephiroth was tempted to make her wait even longer - giving into her demands would only solidify the fact that she could _make_ demands, this he knew from his many years with Genesis - but that would also punish him by forcing him to listen to her wail until he finally gave in and fed her. 

Luna came over and nudged his hand with her nose.

Sephiroth crumbled.

“I will allow this only this one time,” he said, opening the cupboard. “If you continue to misuse your communication privileges, I will have no choice but to revoke them.” He peeled back the easy-open lid and set the can of cat food on the counter.

Luna meowed, but whether it was a ‘thank you’ or an acknowledgment of his statement or neither, he didn’t know.

He watched her finish and then took her out into the living room with him. Sitting down with her on the sofa, he absentmindedly ran his hand along her fur while he considered what to do about Cloud Strife. Surely the other SOLDIER was starting to become annoyed with his unplanned exits. Perhaps it was time to seek pleasure elsewhere.

But who else would dare to demand explanations from him after having only known him for a single night?

Besides Genesis. 

He was not sleeping with Genesis.

He sighed. “If you continue to ruin my encounters with Cloud Strife, I fear I may have to resort to drastic measures to regain his attention.” 

He poked Luna in the ear when she didn’t respond. She swatted at him. 

Predictable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like Rosso probably doesn't make any sense, but I thought it would be amusing to add her and I can't remember DOC stuff for the life of me, so I'm gonna pretend she would have been a normal SOLDIER before weirdness happened. Except, you know, she's not very "normal" in this...


	3. Chapter 3

Despite what some people liked to assume based on his hair color, Cloud wasn’t actually stupid. A little oblivious at times, sure. Who didn’t have those moments? And he didn’t always pay as much attention to things as he probably should. But he was able to look at his recent encounters with Sephiroth and see a bright red pattern.

He’d asked Lazard about Sephiroth’s sudden mission. Not to be nosy, but because Cloud had been there talking to him anyway and he figured he’d find out when Sephiroth would be back so that he could prepare himself for another expected make-out session. 

He’d asked Zack to ask Commander Hewley - ‘please call me Angeal’ - about it after Lazard had given him a strange look, because maybe it’d been a classified mission and Lazard hadn’t been at liberty to say anything. Which meant Angeal also wasn’t at liberty, but if there was one thing Cloud had learned by now, it was that Zack’s puppy face could get him just about anything. 

When it was all said and done, it’d become apparent that there’d been no mission, though Kunsel had given him an interesting tale of Sephiroth running through the building like it was on fire, for reasons yet unknown.

So when Sephiroth approached Cloud at the end of a mission in the middle of nowhere, Cloud wasn’t exactly about to fall over his feet over the guy.

“I do not normally engage in this sort of behavior while on duty, but seeing how we’ve completed our mission satisfactorily…” Sephiroth trailed off, allowing Cloud to fill in the blanks.

He looked uncomfortable, and seeing how several of the nearby SOLDIERs were a little too interested in the nearby bushes, Cloud couldn’t blame him. 

Still, he wasn’t having sex with him if he had some sort of secret lover back home.

“I don’t know, Sir. Are you sure there’s no one else that needs your attention?”

Cloud could have heard a pin drop with how quiet it got.

Sephiroth tensed, ever so slightly. Cloud would have missed it if he hadn’t spent the better part of a month training with Tseng - supposedly at Zack’s insistence, though Cloud had yet to verify that claim - in an attempt to beef up his skills before the next SOLDIER exam. It might have just been Tseng’s way of testing him after he’d caught him hanging out with Aerith, but Cloud did have to admit it had its perks.

“I think you’ve misunderstood the situation.”

Cloud eyed him. Sephiroth - _Sephiroth_ \- shifted in obvious discomfort. Cloud nodded. Sephiroth didn’t lie. Not usually. All the other SOLDIERs had told him that Sephiroth had been single as long as they’d known him, save a few rumored one-night stands. It was probably a little paranoid of him to think Sephiroth had somehow managed to hide some sordid love affair for years when they all literally lived in the same building.

Cloud ran a hand through his hair. He pointedly didn’t look at the other SOLDIERs when he muttered, “I don’t really have my own tent.” 

He’d actually come in on the last flight with Sephiroth, though the General had been busy going over reports the entire trip. The mission had ended pretty quickly once Sephiroth had hit the ground, the last stragglers of the Wutai War no match for the beloved weapon of ShinRa. Cloud hadn’t even had time to unpack.

Sephiroth nodded in the general direction of the lake they’d passed earlier. “I’m sure we can find a suitable substitute.”

Someone off in the distance whistled. Cloud ducked his head to hide his flush.

Sephiroth raised an eyebrow. “I do believe I ordered that those supplies be packed up immediately.”

They jumped back into motion, the others scrambling to complete their assigned take-down duties before they got an ass-whoopin’ from the man that could single-handedly take down a dragon.

Cloud’s lips twitched.

He allowed Sephiroth to lead, following behind at a sedate pace that allowed him to imagine what Sephiroth’s ass looked like underneath his long coat. It wasn’t long before they broke the tree-line and came upon a glimmering ‘lake’ that was no bigger than the pool in the SOLDIER gymnasium. Really more of a pond.

“I-” 

The sentence cut off abruptly as Sephiroth jerked his attention towards something only he could see. Cloud strained his ears for any sign of Wutai combatants that might have been missed, but if there were any that had been waiting out there to ambush them, they didn’t make themselves known.

“Did we miss one?” Cloud whispered.

Sephiroth shook his head. “No, it’s something else. I thought I-” Sephiroth’s eyes narrowed. 

“A monster?”

“Only to rodents.”

“You mean like a ca-”

And then he was gone.

Cloud glanced at his reflection in the water. 

Was it him?

======================================================

Sephiroth grabbed Luna by the scruff of the neck just as she leapt towards the nearby tree. She gave him a pitiful meow in response, but it garnered no sympathy from him. Not when he’d spent the better part of half an hour tracking her as she led him deeper and deeper into the forest. He’d lost count of how many monsters he’d dispatched - all drawn in by the delicious temptation that was a convenient cat-sized meal - or how many branches he’d had to cut through as he marched ever onwards. Masamune was _not_ meant for pruning. 

He raised her up so that he could properly scowl at her.

“You were to stay in my apartment until further notice.” He didn’t bother asking how she’d managed to find her way here. It was simple enough to calculate her movements now that he had hindsight on his side. 

Luna meowed again.

Sephiroth dropped down to his behind. He crossed his legs and sat her on his knee, though he was careful to keep his hand ready in case she darted again. “Explain yourself.”

“Rowrrr.”

He pursed his lips. ‘Boredom’ was hardly an appropriate response. Now he was left with the task of getting her home without drawing too much attention or else risk having her existence exposed.

“I could leave you here.” 

Luna rubbed her head against this leg, as if to say ‘I am too cute to leave to the monsters and you know it.’

She was, unfortunately, correct.

Glancing around, he looked for anything that could be used as a disguise. Some hollowed-out log or maybe a giant leaf. One large enough to wrap around her. Anything to keep his subordinates’ questions at bay on the trek back to ShinRa Headquarters.

The area had trees and more trees. Useless unless he cut one down and carved it up himself.

He tapped his chin. The sleeve of his coat caught his eye. 

He could wrap her in his clothing. So long as he kept Luna completely within its confines and allowed no obviously feline noises to emerge from within, he could pretend to have captured some sort of small creature in the woods. A monster, even. He’d say it was for the Science Department. Who would question him?

Sephiroth pinched the bridge of his nose. Cloud. Cloud would question him. The Third Class was quickly becoming a problem. Even if he sent Cloud home on a different chopper, he’d seen Sephiroth run off after something ‘like a cat’ earlier. If rumors got back to him about Sephiroth sitting in the plane with a suspicious creature it would be over.

“We could walk home,” Sephiroth offered. Fifty klicks west of Ford Condor all the way back to Midgar…Sephiroth had traveled farther distances on the treadmill Hojo used to make him run on day and night, until he succumbed to exhaustion and lost consciousness. 

Luna pressed her front paws on his chest and leaned up to nuzzle his chin. Ah, yes. She grew worried when he spent too much time in his memories.

“What do you think? Should we walk?” 

Luna made a noise that wasn’t exactly disagreement, but which said that she thought he was an idiot nonetheless. 

Perhaps she had a point. While Sephiroth’s body was designed to handle such strains, Luna had barely left the apartment in all her months with him. Trekking over the mountains would be particularly difficult for such a weak creature.

She flicked him with her tail, as if chiding him for considering _her_ weak.

“Of course, you would not be the one actually walking. I will carry you.”

Luna pointedly turned around and ignored him.

Hmmm.

He couldn’t put her in a supply container. They weren’t designed to house living creatures, and if the heat didn’t get to her or the lack of air, then the SOLDIERs tossing the gear around would.

Seeing as their intel hadn’t indicated that the renegade Wutai troops had any explosives, they’d elected not to bring extra transportation. If Sephiroth requested a chopper solely for himself, he’d have to explain to ShinRa why they now had to foot the bill to send a different chopper to pick up the rest of the troops. 

If only there were someone who would help without exposing them to the company. Someone with the means of returning her to his apartment without drawing too much attention. Or, perhaps, by drawing just the right amount of attention.

Sephiroth pulled out his PHS. It rang once.

“Yes?” Genesis asked in a sleep-logged mumble that said whoever had called had better be prepared to explain themselves or risk death by Firaga.

Sephiroth rolled his eyes. It was 9 AM in Midgar. If Genesis was still sleeping, it was because he was _lazy._

“I need your help.”

That seemed to wake him up. 

================================

Cloud blinked as Kunsel told him the news. “Wait, so you’re saying that Commander Rhapsodos threw a fit at being passed over for the mission and demanded a chopper to head down there even though we were already done?”

“Yeeeeep,” Zack said, licking the pudding off his spoon. 

“That’s not the most interesting part.” Kunsel dipped his bread into Zack’s spaghetti when he wasn’t looking. “The interesting part is that they actually gave it to him.”

“I don’t know, guys. I’ve trained with him before. You know, because of Angeal. I’d probably have given it to him too.” Zack made a face that spoke of nightmares that could never be forgotten. 

“And Sephiroth stayed there to help cool him down when he arrived?” Cloud added, still trying to piece everything together. 

“Yeah. Must have worked too. He didn’t burn anything when he got back!” Zack said it like it was some kind of victory. 

Cloud was pretty sure that believing SOLDIER’s _second in command_ might burn anything in the first place negated whatever ‘good’ came from him not actually doing it.

“Yeah. He did get something, though. Rumors say he came back with a body bag.” Kunsel’s voice dropped down to a whisper as he leaned in. “Some even say it was still moving.”


	4. Chapter 4

Cloud turned the corner that led to his apartment and then immediately turned right back around when he saw who was standing outside his door.

Nuh-uh. No way. Not gonna happen.

“Third Class Strife.”

Cloud froze. So that was how it was gonna be then, huh?

Pivoting on his heel, he marched back towards Sephiroth. He gave him a salute that was only barely up to regulations. And a scowl, for good measure.

“Sir.”

“I see you’re angry with me.” Sephiroth looked amused for a moment before he sighed. “I’m sorry. I have mistreated you. I realize that rumors have filtered throughout all levels of the company regarding our ‘relationship’ and I have yet to even make their assumptions worthwhile. It does little to remedy the situation, but I would like you to know that I have an explanation for my actions, though I am unable to tell you what they are at this time.”

“I can live with the rumors.” If that’d been the problem, he’d have said no when Sephiroth approached him in front of two dozen witnesses. “I’m just starting to get a little blue-balled, Sir.” He drawled that last sentence and gave Sephiroth a look that clearly said one of them was to blame for said blue-balls and it certainly wasn’t Cloud.

Sephiroth chuckled. Cloud tried not to melt at the sound.

“Unfortunately, I’ve come to the conclusion that perhaps ‘dating’ isn’t for me. At least not while I have certain obligations. I would be more than happy to keep trying with you, if you’d let me, but I’m afraid I can’t guarantee that I won’t run off again.”

Cloud shifted out of his salute. Well this was a conundrum, wasn’t it? Did he want to keep trying to get it on with someone who had been quite literally named ‘Sexiest Man Alive’ by the tabloids and hope that maybe, _maybe_ it might turn into something more if he could stomach the abrupt and random departures for who knew where? Or did he want to go back to his miserable life of trying to get a quickie in with the random guys - and others - who seemed to think he was going to be some kind of fair maiden just because of his looks before _he_ was the one who had to inevitably run off when duty called?

Who was he kidding? No way in hell was he turning down _Sephiroth._

“Maybe we could just go to dinner? We don’t have to get into the sex part right away. If you want to. Or we could just have sex. Try to have sex. Whatever you want. It doesn’t’ have to be serious. But it could be.” Gaia, Cloud hoped his face wasn’t as red as it felt.

Sephiroth blinked. As if he’d never considered the possibility of _actually_ dating. Like a normal person. And not…whatever they’d been doing.

“That would be acceptable.”

Cloud gave him a grin.

=====================================================

Their date went well enough. Better than the first one, and the second one, if those could be considered dates. Cloud wasn’t even going to consider the time in the forest. 

It’d just been them grabbing some tacos on the way home from wandering around the Slums - Sephiroth had said that people stared at him less down there - followed by an impromptu make-out session in one of the back alleys. Sure, Sephiroth had stared at the tacos like he expected them to attack him, but that’d only been for a few minutes. 

Which was totally unfair to the tacos. They were delicious. Sure, Zack claimed that he had seen the owner drag a monster through the kitchen doors that one time, but that had probably had a logical explanation.

Probably.

Cloud was just going to pretend that Zack had been messing with him. Just in case.

The night had gone so well in fact that, despite his better judgment, Cloud decided to go ahead and give sex another try. This time in a hotel room, because neither one of them wanted to wait to get back to the tower. 

And besides, Rosso was probably dissecting some poor creature in Cloud’s living room, and Sephiroth’s place was apparently haunted. A hotel seemed safest.

The sex was, in a word, _fantastic._ Sephiroth had done _things_ with his mouth and his hands and his body. Things Cloud hadn’t even known existed. 

Cloud didn’t have many experiences to compare it with, but he felt pretty confident in declaring it the best sex he’d ever had or _would_ ever have. 

Best. Date. Ever.

That is, until he’d plucked a random hair off Sephiroth’s head when the other man had laid his cheek against his chest. 

“Huh, that’s weird.” He held up the tiny white hair for Sephiroth to see. “A cat land on your head this morning?” He grinned but Sephiroth didn’t. “Sephiroth?”

Sephiroth rolled out of bed and began picking up his clothes. “I have to go.”

“But we didn’t finish!”

Sephiroth looked at Cloud and then to the sheets and then to Cloud again. 

Cloud flushed. “I mean…we’re both SOLDIERs…” Yet another one of the perks of being one of ShinRa’s elite: multiple orgasms. Cloud had kind of been looking forward to that now that he’d finally made it into the program.

Sephiroth’s lips twitched, but he continued getting dressed. “I have something I forgot to do. The room has been paid for already. Feel free to stay the night.” He slipped on his jacket and made his way to the door. 

Turning around, Sephiroth offered him one last “goodbye.”

“B-” 

Aaaaand he was gone.

Groaning, Cloud threw his arm over his eyes.

Maybe he should have taken Zack’s offer of a threesome.

=============================================

Sephiroth paced his apartment. 

Cloud knew. Or he was on the cusp of knowing.

It was unlikely that Cloud would inform ShinRa of Sephiroth’s transgression directly, but it was possible he would allow it to slip without meaning to and the result would be no different than if he’d gone straight to the Science Department himself. 

Sephiroth could tell him to remain quiet, but how long would that last? He was close friends with Zack. He’d tell him eventually and then Zack would be the one to leak it. Sephiroth couldn’t help but recall all of the times Angeal had complained about his student’s lack of discretion. 

He glanced at Luna. She looked up at him from the small robot she was currently chasing around the living room.

“Meow?”

He couldn’t risk it.


	5. Chapter 5

Cloud stomped up to Sephiroth’s apartment.

“I know you’re in there!”

No response.

He gave it another moment before kicking the door in. Just like they’d taught him in basics. He was probably going to get in trouble later for that - if Sephiroth didn’t impale him with Masamune first, in which case he’d be in trouble for it now - but Cloud couldn’t be bothered to care. He liked to think that he was normally a fairly calm guy. He didn’t let the little things get to him.

But being re-stationed at the _Northern Crater_ was no little thing.

“Sephiroth, we need to ta-”

Cloud blinked. The apartment was _wrecked._

Books had been knocked off the shelf, pillows had been torn to shreds, there was a pile of toilet paper sitting on the coffee table for no apparent reason. And Sephiroth was sitting in the middle of it flipping through a report like nothing was amiss. 

“Um…” 

“Cloud.” Sephiroth glanced at his door. “I hope you realize that you’re going to pay for that.”

“Okay.” 

The room went quiet, save Sephiroth’s occasional page-turning. 

Cloud didn’t really know where to go from there. He’d come here to fuck shit up, but apparently someone had beaten him to it. Now he just felt silly.

It didn’t help that Sephiroth was just so calm about it all. In the middle of the disaster area that was once his apartment. 

“What happened?”

“You are not the only one upset with me today.”

“Who-”

A squeaky toy flew across the room and hit Sephiroth squarely in the face. Sephiroth sighed. 

Cloud watched as the most arrogant creature he’d ever seen in his life sauntered across the floor and hopped up to rub its butt against Sephiroth’s chest.

“So you do have a cat.” Cloud had begun to wonder.

“Luna isn’t mine. She’s…visiting.”

“Visiting.” The sarcasm was almost palpable.

“Yes. Visiting.”

Cloud gave him an ‘oh really’ look. “Was she also visiting the other day when it sounded like a poltergeist was attacking your bedroom furniture? Or when your PHS suddenly decided it was going to be the next big star on ‘Cats Got Talent?’ Or when you ran out of the room like your grandmother was on fire because I found a _hair_ on you?”

“…Yes.”

Cloud glared at him.

“I will remind you that I am your superior officer, and I don’t actually have to answer to you.”

That…was true.

“I’ll tell Angeal on you.” 

Sephiroth’s lips twitched. “He is also my subordinate.”

“Yeah, but he’ll still lecture you.” 

Everyone knew the only thing more terrifying than Sephiroth’s single-minded ruthlessness or Genesis’ maniacal pyromania was Angeal’s horrifically long spiels about honor and pride and dreams and all that good stuff.

“You make a fair point.”

The cat stretched out to rub her head against his chin. Sephiroth may not have been claiming her, but she was certainly claiming him. He gave her a look of pure betrayal. 

“Why’d she tear up your place, anyway?” Cloud asked. Maybe he could work his way up to Sephiroth’s strange obsession of pretending he didn’t have a pet that he clearly did have.

“I have a long mission scheduled for next week. She dislikes being left alone and insists that I bring her with me. That is obviously out of the question.”

“Because then people would know about her?”

Sephiroth nodded after a moment. “I had to keep her a secret. We’re not allowed to have pets in the building,” he explained, gently rubbing behind her ears.

Cloud snorted. “You’re _Sephiroth._ You’re telling me they wouldn’t have made an exception?”

“I may have also stolen her from the Science Department.”

Cloud deflated. Oh.

“Undoubtedly they are still looking for her. She was mentioned in several reports that were mysteriously destroyed. I’m certain they’re eager to regain the data they lost.”

How was Cloud supposed to stay angry now? Everyone knew the not-so-secret-secret of Sephiroth’s upbringing. Designed to be perfect. Raised in a lab like some guinea pig. Only allowed out once ShinRa had realized he could be utilized for more than just mako experiments. Cloud had heard all about it from the whispered tales the older SOLDIERs told when no one else was around.

“So you tried to make sure I didn’t find out. Because you don’t really know me.” It made sense. 

Sephiroth continued to massage Luna’s fur. 

“You know, they don’t have to know it’s the one you took. Just say you found some random cat somewhere.”

“The timing would be suspect.” 

Luna crawled up onto Sephiroth’s shoulders and proceeded to go to sleep. Cloud’s heart squeezed at how utterly adorable it was.

“I could say that I found her and gave her to you? I mean, everyone already thinks we’re together. Just say it’s a gift from your boyfriend.”

“My boyfriend?” 

Luna shifted so that her nose was touching Sephiroth’s neck and when she yawned her little pink tongue came out and poked him.

Who could resist that?

“Well, it’ll have to be a long distance relationship. Apparently I’m being sent to the Northern Crater.”

Sephiroth had the grace to look chastised. “I will take care of that.” He eyed the sad excuse for a door now hanging off the hinges of his doorframe. “I still expect you to fix my door.”

It was Cloud’s turn to wince. “I’ll go deal with that right now.”

“No need. I’m certain it can wait until morning.” He pulled out his PHS and tapped a few things Cloud couldn’t see. What sounded like metal doors slammed shut in the distance. 

“Due to the strategic position of this floor beneath the executive offices above, I have the ability to lock down the entrances until the threat has passed.”

“And what threat is that?”

Sephiroth stood, placing Luna on the sofa behind him. He prowled over to Cloud, forcing him back until he hit the wall. “Me.”

Cloud swallowed.

“You said mentioned something about us being SOLDIERs?” Sephiroth murmured, leaning to kiss him.

Cloud probably should have felt bad for all the other SOLDIERs now stranded outside their apartments, but he really couldn’t find it in himself to care right then.

Cloud caught sight of Luna when they parted. She had one eye open and was lazily flicking her tail back and forth as she spied on them. 

“Uh, I think your cat is watching us.”

“Well then, I suppose we should take this to the bedroom.”

Yes. Yes they should.

**Author's Note:**

> I'd love to hear what you all thought! Comments & kudos are appreciated. <3
> 
> I'm sorry that it didn't have as many Luna and Sephiroth moments as I would have liked to have included. My muse sort of took a strange turn somewhere in there. :( Perhaps I'll come back and write a side-story with just them. 
> 
> I'll admit I was in a bit of a rush since I originally started on this, then decided to work on a different fic for the exchange, and then _came back_ to this when I realized that the second fic couldn't possibly be finished in the time I had left. (I'm still working on it and it's gonna be big! *Cue Burt Gummer voice*)
> 
> Also, I should probably note that I don't actually have a cat myself. So it was probably silly of me to pick the one prompt involving one. OTL I'm sorry if I've made some terrible cat mistake somewhere in the fic.


End file.
